On Friday, we began our weekend of misdeeds by driving an hour and a half away to visit a Staples. Why do that? You ask. Well we wanted to print off a wonderful game known as Cards Against Humanity. I was introduced to this game by my mom's boyfriend Warren. He told me that the best way to get the card game was to go to Staples. Not only do they have the best deal, but the people who created the game also suggest it. (It's in the PDF file.)
So we drove out to the closest Staples, and proceeded to wonder how on earth to send the PDF file to the printer lady with our phones. On mine, I couldn't attach a file, but we finally made it happen on Ambria's phone by converting it to a Kindle file.
We got it printed. For less than four dollars. We then went to McDonalds for a super cheap dinner then drove back to Ambria's house. Then we proceeded to drink mixed drinks and beer and cut out the card. And then we decided to go one step further and "hoosier laminate" the cards with clear packing tape. It was going fine and dandy until we ran out of tape and still had a ton more cards to go.
We decided at that point to go to Walmart. At 1:45 AM. Totally a normal thing to do. We hopped in the car and drove down, collected tape and cinnamon rolls, paid, and were on our way back home. Once there, it was almost three in the morning, (apparently we had been wandering around Wally World for a ridiculously long time) so instead of doing the cards, we went to bed.
The whole next day, we lounged around in our jim-jams and laminated cards and danced to music on the TV "I Love Music" channels. And then we texted Angi to see if she wanted to do anything. We weren't being really irresponsible.
She said she would pick us up after she go off work. We started drinking the last of the champagne, then had a few beers. She got there around eleven. We went to one bar that was supposed to have some good bands playing. It was empty and there was a guy standing at the mic with a harmonica. We left.
We went to another bar and started playing darts. But then they told us to leave. So then Angi asked Manny (her boyfriend) if there was anything he was doing. He was going over to his friend's house to drink. We were all invited.
So we went back to Ambria's house, collected the rest of our beer, vodka, and rum, then got back into Angi's car and went to pick up Manny. Since Ambria had started drinking around six, we were already feeling pretty buzzed. So by the time we got to the house, we were picking up our drinking pace.
I will admit that I get to a point that I forget how much I drank previously, so I have at four different times made myself sick because I forget that I shouldn't mix my alcohols.
Thankfully, that didn't happen. While I was mixing my drinks, (plus drinking what was there) I managed to not get anywhere near puking my guts out. After all that we had brought, plus wine and gin and even more beer, I was just delightfully drunk. It was excellent.
All the way until I was giving relationship advice to one of the guys. I think my near exact words were, "Don't be the morning after pill! Be the condom! You want to be first line of defense against pregnancy! You don't wanna be an afterthought!" And then there was hugging. Like I had said something really profound in the scheme of things.
Maybe not really.
Anyways, it was almost five in the morning so we all decided to leave. Before we got in the car, I spotted one of those really old Treasure Trolls. I pointed it out to Ambria, and we smiled a lot at the guy whose house it was. We ended up procuring said Troll.
Getting into the car was probably not one of my brighter ideas. Of course, I wasn't driving, but we all climbed into the car with Angi who was just as drunk as any of us. She was so drunk she couldn't get the gas nozzle into her car. Looking back, Ambria and I should have called Jack, (Ambria's step-dad). We did get home safely, and without incident, but it was incredibly stupid, irresponsible, and moronic to have let her get behind the wheel at all.
When we woke up at eleven, we got up, put on our jim-jam pants and went to Starbucks for breakfast sandwiches. We ate them while we drove back to Ambria's, climbed back into bed and slept until four in the afternoon. It was glorious, but I was still hungover.
Finally, I decided to pack up and go home. Thankfully, Adam was making ribs, and I was able to nurse the rest of my hangover away on my mom's couch while still laminating my cards.
I am still not done with that project, but that is was tomorrow is for. Right?
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