Making Money

I work at a restaurant as a busser. I would work as a server, except the company's newest policy is that I have to be twenty-one. Since I won't be twenty-one for at least one more year, I am stuck bussing and hosting.


My days usually go as follows:


Get to work, bus some tables, run some food, deal with nice customers, deal with bitches.


For the bitches, I have a couple guidelines:


If you have NEVER worked in a restaurant, YOU ARE NOT RIGHT, EVER. No, you cannot just sit where ever you want. If I am taking you to a table, sit at that fucking table, because I SWEAR TO GOD THERE IS A FUCKING REASON I AM TAKING YOU TO THAT TABLE.


If you ask to sit outside, then you are going to go outside. At no point in time is it okay to just arbitrarily decide that you want to be seated inside as soon as we call your name. Our restaurant gets packed, and having very limited seating inside means that there is definitely going to be a longer wait for that, especially during the very hot days of summer.


I am NOT A SERVANT. I do NOT do your bidding, nor am I some trained monkey that will just fetch shit for you. If you ordered a pizza with pepperoni and I bring out that pizza, DO NOT GET IN MY FACE IF YOU FORGOT YOU WANT SAUSAGE ON IT. I will bring you out some fucking sausage if it means that much to you. Otherwise, you just save 25 cents.


If the kitchen screws up and forgets to put bacon on your burger or gives you chips instead of fries, I WILL FUCKING FIX THE PROBLEM. Keep the fucking chips, I will bring out some fries in a basket. It is not a big deal, SO DON'T FREAK THE FUCK OUT ABOUT IT. It gets on my nerves.


DO NOT MOVE THE RESTAURANT FURNITURE. Period. If there is an umbrella at a table, IT IS ANCHORED TO THE MOTHER FUCKING GROUND. DON'T FUCKING TOUCH IT. DO NOT MOVE TABLES. DO NOT TOUCH THE CABINETS. DO NOT ACT LIKE THIS IS YOUR HOUSE. GET YOUR MOTHER FUCKING FEET OFF THE TABLE.


Lastly, PAY FOR YOUR FOOD AND TIP 20%.


I do not know what the fuck is wrong with people. Do not ever go to a restaurant and just not pay. It is RUDE. The only way servers, bussers, hosts, all the kitchen people, and the management get paid is if people PAY. What is so hard about this concept?


Tip your server because that is how they make a living. They are getting paid nothing because all of their money comes from tips. If your food tasted bad, YOUR SERVER DIDN'T COOK IT. If your food came out late, YOUR SERVER DIDN'T TELL THE KITCHEN TO BE SLOW. If your iced tea isn't refilled immediately, STOP DRINKING SO FUCKING FAST. YOUR CUP IS NOT MADE OF MAGIC. IT DOES NOT REPLENISH ITSELF AND NEITHER DOES THE PITCHER. WHEN YOU GO THROUGH TWO GALLONS OF TEA IN 20 FUCKING MINUTES, WE HAVE TO MAKE A NEW PITCHER OF TEA. THAT TAKES A WHILE.


It is frustrating working in a restaurant. All of those things above happen everyday. People sit themselves where ever they want, are mean to every person they encounter, are rude to their servers, to bussers, to hosts. They think they know what they are talking about when they don't. Being called a liar when I have no control of the air conditioning, having people wanting to report me to a manager for telling them they cannot move umbrellas, and having people send back salads because there are "too many" croutons is what I deal with all the time.


So while I love making money so that I can pay to live in my cute little apartment, I hate dealing with nitwits.


Next time you go out into the world, weather to go to the zoo or the cinema, or a restaurant, remember that WE, the people who are trying to help you have a good day, also want to have just as good a day as you. We work on Mother's Day, Easter, Memorial Day, Labor Day, and all of the other great holidays you get off. We are missing out on spending time with our families and friends because those are the days normal people venture out. Just because you have been waiting an hour doesn't mean that everyone else hasn't been. The only customers that get special treatment are the ones that are pleasant. Because ultimately it's the customers that will make our days good or bad.