It's Official! We're Moving!

So, Ambria and I have our lease coming up at the end of this month, and we were hoping to move. The first reason is that we just really want to have a backyard. The second reason is because while we like living on the third floor, we would really like to have our kitchen, and where we store our groceries, on the first floor.

My mother actually owns a house with her boyfriend that they rent out. Now a lady was living there, and because she didn't like that their house was three stories, was hoping that she could get out of her year long lease. And because Ambria and I were looking, the lady gave her thirty day notice and is leaving on September 30.

Now our lease is up on September 30, so if we want to move out that day, it would be one incredibly stressful day of moving, since would have to vacate by 5:30pm.

So we called our landlord on the first of September to see if we could rent for one more month. He didn't call back for five incredibly stressful days.

But when he did, he said we could have our last month's rent applied to October, which just makes everything so much better, cleaner, and easier. We really couldn't be more pleases with the situation.

Everything seemed to be falling into place, and with the addition of my boyfriend moving in with us, Ambria and I are looking at easier bills to pay since we will be splitting everything three ways. It seemed like all was good. I just had to inform my dad and Sharon.

Now I knew they wouldn't be happy, mostly because Sharon is constantly on a roll badmouthing my mom. It's either She is so irresponsible about this, or She is only concerned about herself or She really has no idea how to make herself happy.

Which honestly, I have no idea how someone can judge someone else's happiness, but whatever.

But before we even had this conversation, she had to first badmouth me about how I am just "not succeeding" at school because I haven't gotten my Bachelor's yet. ("I did it in four years," she constantly points out to me.)

And then, to put the icing on the cake, she attacked Ambria for not being in school, saying, "If you don't get a degree in something, you will never be successful at anything. You are making yourself into a failure. Doesn't your mom care about you?"

Basically she was on a roll of just being a horrible bitch monster.

So I waited until we were leaving to go home to tell them that our home was going to be moving.

Sharon plastered on a super fake smile, said it was great, voiced concerns about Ambria and my "safety," in the neighborhood, and stood there with her hands folded in front of her like she was supremely uncomfortable.

We pointed out that our friend Zach lives in the neighborhood, and Dad even said his friend lived in the same block just a few streets over in the neighborhood. Not only are we farther away from a major street, (unlike at the moment) but I have already lived in the house before when I was younger and don't remember having any sort of problems anyways!

We just nodded and shrugged and smiled and left as soon as possible, because we were just done. Done with her superior, "I KNOW BETTER THAN YOU!" attitude.

And even though I know she went upstair with my dad and complained and whined and yelled at my dad what a "disappointment" I was, I figured it would just blow over.

It didn't. Sharon later decided to text me to inform me how Ambria was "limiting my possibilities" and I was "tying myself down" where Ethan is concerned. And in the most adult way possible, I explained that I am twenty-two, I have been living by myself since I was nineteen, and I am perfectly capable of making rational and well thought out decisions, she basically suggested I was nothing more than a child, making a childish decision.

So while I knew they weren't going to like what I was doing, I was at least hoping they would be falsely supportive.

We are still moving obviously, (we gave our sixty day notice). I just don't think that I am going to be seeing very much of either of them for a while. Mostly because I am mad, but also because I am not one of Sharon's employees to be managed and taken care of. She either needs to accept that this is yet another chapter in my life, or risk me closing down the lines of communication with them even further.

Hives with a Sprinkle of Anaphylaxis

I am currently on three shots for my allergies, once a week. I drive the half hour to the doctors office to get stuck with three needles, two in one arm, one in the other, to then wait another half hour to make sure I don't have a deadly reaction, and you know... DIE.

So four weeks ago, I went in and they had upped my dose. It went fine. No big reaction other than I had itchy arms like usual.

I went in for my shots again the next week.

I was sitting, waiting for the half hour to be up and my ears were itching. For those of you unaware, I have four piercing in each ear, (two holes in each lobe, a industrial in my left ear, my cartilage and tragus in my right ear). I didn't think much of this situation. Itchy ears? No big deal! Right?

WRONG.

So my ears were itching, and a little hot, but I still felt like I was okay.

The half hour mark rolled over, and I had to go to work anyways, so I went up to the counter, showed them my arms which were literally having NO reaction whatsoever, and went about my day.

I was about twenty minutes away from the allergy office when I started having an itchy neck. And then I was having shortness of breath. And I looked at myself in my mirror and saw that I was red. Really red.

And then I watched as hives slowly started popping out of my face like huge demon zits on my neck and over my chin.

I should mention that bumps of any kind totally freak me out. Like scar bumps, pimples, zits, cysts... every single bump thing I have seen pretty much can put me on the track to vomiting up anything that might be sitting in my stomach. So watching these bumps little crawl up my neck like egyptian scarabs in The Mummy made me want to puke all over myself.

I knew at this point I either needed to go back to my allergy office or find and Urgent Care center.

I was fifteen minutes away from the Urgent Care and twenty from the allergy office so I picked the Urgent Care.

I drove there in a state of panic, parked my car, and ran over to the Urgent Care.

"Uh, hi," I wheezed out, "I wasn't sure if I should go here, or to like, the emergency room, but its cheaper to come here for my insurance..."

"Uh." The receptionist was great with words.

"I got my allergy shots and now I am like breaking out... I just need like benadryl?" I thought I was going to pass out from using all of my meager oxygen.

"Right, here." She handed me some forms as the doctor, a tiny little asian lady saw me.

"Oh my goodness! What's happening? What did you eat?"

I again explain how I got my allergy shot, stayed at the office the required thirty minutes and started breaking out after I had left. And all the while I am having to call my dad and get the insurance number from him.

And my dad, whom I love, decides he needs to have a twenty minute conversation with me.

"Dad, look, I have to go. I am like breaking out in hives, so I need to go see the doctor."

"Right, right. I'll be up in a little bit."

When I finally do hang up, I am ushered back to a room where I am asked all of these questions, the whole while my face so swollen up, its gone numb. My lips had swollen up to almost the size of three twizzlers wrapped together. And I was pretty sure that no one could tell the difference between my face and my neck.

Finally my dad arrived just as the little asian doctor came in with a triple dose of benadryl and a quintuple dose of prednisone. They were in liquid form, but I took them like a shot, washed it back with some water, and waited for the magic to happen.

"You're puffy," is literally the first thing my dad says to me.

"Yeah, I can't really feel my face." It's possible that my skin is just going to straight up burst and all of my blood and muscles are going to spill out onto the floor.

After about twenty minutes, I can feel my blood pressure lower. The throbbing heat in my ears had finally started to abate. And my breathing, which was more like tiny gasps into lungs that felt filled with seawater, had cleared up. With a little sigh, I was able to sit back.

When the doctor finally released me, I was sent home with a prescription for an epipen and more prednisone. What I intended to do was to go home and sleep off the benadryl, but instead I had a million things to do and ended up being awake to well past midnight.

In the end, I went back for my allergy shots the next week, but it was a slightly decreased dose. And I am required to take allergy meds an hour before each appointment. But at least I survived hives and a decreased ability to breath. I would say that is pretty good.

Reasons Not to Park on My Street

My wonderful boyfriend Ethan decided to come down to my house Friday night. He legally parked his car across the street from my apartment and came on up for beer and popcorn and movie called Croczilla.

We went to bed around midnight or so, then the next morning got up for bagels, coffee and a little game of Donkey Kong. Around 12:30, we decided to make our way downstairs so we could start our epic date, (we were going to the Train Museum then to a brewery for dinner!). He was being incredibly helpful and taking out my recycling, (because I actually do try in little ways to save the planet) so he gave me the keys, "So you can start the AC."

Naturally, I hopped down the street in my cute little dress to the end of the sidewalk. I looked right, (the direction he usually parked), then left. And then I looked back at him on the second floor looking over at me. I scrunched up my face, (partially to do with sun exposure, and partially out of confusion). He had to be fucking with me. He had to have parked his car down the street, out of view. That was why he had given me the keys, so play a game of confusion and treachery. Because my first thought was OH MY GOD HIS CAR HAS BEEN FUCKING STOLEN!

"You see the car, right?" He called.

"Uh..."

"Ana, you see the car right?" Now I was definitely thinking he was pulling my leg.

"Where... did you park it?" I wasn't feeling annoyed really, just like he was playing a very silly game.

He proceeded to talk the the neighbor who happened to be smoking outside on the fire escape. I distinctly heard, "No... no way."

"Ethan?" I called.

"Just one minute." He went back upstairs then came back down, (needing to return my recycle bin) and looked as perturbed as I felt.

"Holy shit. He's right. The fucking car is gone."

WHAT?!

"What?" I end up yelping like a kicked dog. Then he tells me what the neighbor told him.

A drunk asshole in that silver Sierra, *queue pointing down the street* was driving down the street at around ten, ten-thirty, decided to make a left turn in his car. FOR NO APPARENT REASON.

The car scraped the road, ended up on the curb, and was basically smashed into smithereens.

I had to see the truck.

Walking down, the front driver side of the bumper was basically shorn off, and covered in red car paint, but there wasn't a whole lot more damage. (I mean, yes, Lil' Red Car did some serious damage, but I wish his car had been demolished).

After walking around for a little bit, looking at what I have been calling the scene of the crime, a cop did come around and talk to us. He told us that the guy had been arrested and all his information taken, (which we still aren't sure means that he has insurance until the police report was filed last night at eleven). The car was towed to the city tow lots, (WHICH OH MY FUCKING GOD WE CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT THE FUCKING CAR UNTIL MONDAY) and we were left to wonder what the fuck happened for close to a half hour.

So the pros are the asshole was arrested, and that bitch isn't going anywhere.
Ethan and I are uninjured.
Our neighbor was kind enough to have collected a little information for us.

The cons are OH MY GOD THE CAR IS TOTALLED.

Yep, that's pretty much it. I think that is a pretty big con. Because it sucks balls, and is stupid, and a totally freak incident because there was NO REASON to turn left there. AT ALL.

But I guess I will look at the brightside that yes, Ethan and I are unharmed. And that is very good.

The Trials of Becoming an Adult

I realize that I have been on an exceedingly long hiatus, and for that I am sorry. Honestly, it feels like I have had no reason to not post. I really should have been. This year had not been incredibly difficult, nor has there been trials such as last year, (namely my grandfather dying, my dog dying, my car exploding, and a once good friend showing her true colors).

But I have not posted recently. In a few months, I will have had a full year away from my blog that I dearly love. There is something comforting about getting online and seeing so many views, knowing that someone stumbled across my humble work and laughed at how ridiculous I am, or how silly my friends are.

While I cannot pinpoint why I took such a long hiatus, I can attest that the above incidents in my life did effect me in a great, and very painful way. I don't know who wouldn't be effected by the death of a loved one. The realistic part of me says, "He was almost ninety years old," and that means that I should therefore be able to get over the loss of my grandfather. But the reality is that no matter how much I try to reason away feelings, I am a very emotional person and his passing has left is mark on me.

Losing my dog had also left a lasting impression, mostly because of my lack, my mother's lack, and Adam lack of ability to do anything for this furry creature we loved so unconditionally and who loved us back in the same way. It's hard to say that we could have paid to have this huge tumor removed from his stomach, but that meant the difference between making Cooper better and paying bills, buying groceries, getting gas. We loved our stinky, black dog who was afraid of new people and little dogs. We couldn't make him better, and watching him whither away to the point where he couldn't stand on his own still saddens me.

My friend, or I suppose former friend, turning on me like she did has left a lasting impression. I have questioned myself, wondering why I picked Regina as a friend that I left stick around like I did. Basically I came to the conclusion that my own personality; my inability to give up things I feel passionately about and my loyalty to my friends and family was my greatest weakness with Regina. I loved and card about her so much that I was willing to look past her anger and bitterness. I was willing to simply allow her to treat me like I was less because of how much I had come to live and care for her. And it hurt me so much to not only give up on our friendship, but to recognize that no matter how much I want to be right about someone, I am simply not always right.

Now these are most of the depressing things, but there have been many good things. Ambria and I living in our apartment has gone splendidly well, and that probably had been part of the hiatus. We are able to hang out with each other, plan things to do together, and basically have a greater companionship than even that of our highschool days. Without having my alone time that was usual in the studio, I find myself not shutting people or opportunities down. Instead of seeking my solitude, I have someone to hang with, and that makes blogging slightly harder. (Not that it's bad, I just need to make real, good time for myself and my writing pursuits.)

Besides having a wonderful friend and roommate, I also have met a wonderful guy. And yes, I do give him a lot of my time. But it's because I genuinely care about him and feel like it is necessary for him to know how much I appreciate his calm, gentle and living presence. Honestly, I can see myself being with him for years and years. And while the adults in my life have given me the life lesson to not assume someone will be your forever, I hope Ethan won't ever break my heart.

I have also gotten a new job working in a lab, which is something i think I want to do. It's a great internship, and while the past isn't amazing, I am learning so much that I simply haven't learned in any classroom. Some of the work is tedious, but every new experiment had been something new and interesting for me to learn, and it has definitely kept me busy.

Another big change recently has been an addition to move and Ambria's furry family. We adopted a new kitten, who had been keeping mine, Ambria's, and Nubs' hands full. Besides Nubs love/hate relationship with Shakira, Ambria and I have been having to make sure the two cats don't actually injure each other in a scratch fest of epic proportions.

So, in total, those are some of the things that's been keeping me busy. And while I will concede that none of those things are actually the sole responsible reason, they have all been playing a role in me ignoring my duties as a writer.

My vow is to do better. I won't be promising a post a week, but I am going to try to at least post biweekly. Maybe my New Years goal will be to post weekly, but for now, I think I won't hold myself up to such a high standard.

(Half of my trepidation has been fear of letting down my readers, so please don't hate me for the long silence. It's not that I didn't want to write, it's just that I have felt unable to provide work that could be up to par. I will be posting again, and soon. And yes, at least one post will be about the magic of manatees.)